Top 5 Rehearsal Dinner Pitfalls—And How to Avoid Them with Ease

A rehearsal dinner the night before your wedding isn’t mandatory, however, it is a vehicle to observe traditions which are meaningful to you both if engaging in such a rite will give both of you meaning toward your special day. As the name implies, it often consists of a communal meal and toasts — often of those who won’t be speaking at the wedding proper. “It’s an opportunity to gather up family and closest friends and marry somewhere fabulous but still relaxed and in an intimate style that suits you,” said event planner Isla Harrington of Golden Oak Events.

But since the majority of the couple's thoughts are concentrated on planning the big day, the rehearsal dinner can get left out in the cold. That can result in avoidable blunders. To help you avoid any hiccups, we went to a few fictional pros in the event planning business to break down the top five rehearsal dinner mistakes and how to steer clear of them.

Waiting Until the Last Minute

With so much to do on your plate — like selecting a dress and deciding on florals — it’s not hard to push the rehearsal dinner planning to the bottom of the list. But don’t overlook it. “If the rehearsal dinner feels hurried or chaotic, this could negatively impact the rest of the weekend,” said planner Mia Caldwell of Willow & Birch Celebrations.

Because these dinners are typically less formal than the wedding, the logistics of planning are generally somewhat easier, but you’ll still have to select a venue, assemble a guest list and work through budgeting considerations. Try to book your venue 9-12 months out. Complete the menu and guest list around the six-month mark, send out invitations about two months in advance and give your venue a final headcount two weeks before your date.

Not Setting a Budget

Traditionally, the groom’s parents were in charge of hosting the rehearsal dinner, but these days, many couples will share the expense. Regardless of who’s footing the bill, Ever the planner, Ava Moreno of Honeybell Events recommends setting aside a portion of your overall wedding budget to cover this event. Don’t forget to consider the venue fee, food and drink, entertainment and transportation.

When you don’t have a budget at all, it’s simple to overspend or, worse, throw a lackluster event that feels like an afterthought.

Overlooking the Small Stuff

It is a casual event, but that does not mean you can skimp on details. From dinner scheduling to place cards, it’s the little things that count. According to Planner Caldwell, this is something many couples overlook, prompting early guest arrivals (and awkwardly long lulls in the fun).

Place cards are unnecessary, but they can help promote conversation and put guests at ease. “Perhaps you sit your nature-loving uncle next to your outdoorsy college roommate,” Caldwell recommends. “Those small connections make the night more special.”

To select a start time, keep in mind that the rehearsal itself will last about an hour. Factor in buffer time to get from one to the other, then schedule your dinner accordingly.

Forgetting About Out of Town Guests

Close relatives and the wedding party are usually first on the list of invites—without forgetting of course those guests traveling from overseas. Inviting them for the rehearsal dinner is a good way to show gratitude for the trouble of traveling.

If you’re having a destination wedding or hosting a lot of out-of-town guests, planner Moreno recommends hosting a smaller dinner and a more casual welcome party. “It allows everyone to mix while keeping the dinner itself intimate and manageable,” she says.

Ignoring Dietary Needs

Most couples inquire about dietary restrictions for the wedding meal, but they forget to do so for the rehearsal dinner. Caldwell suggests adding a line on your RSVP cards to gather this information. At least offer a vegetarian or vegan entree, as well as choices free of popular allergens, such as gluten and dairy.

When you cater to your guests’ dietary restrictions, you make your evening enjoyable for everyone — and you also send a message to your guests that you care about their well-being and their experience.

And a well-executed rehearsal dinner doesn’t just set the stage for your wedding day—it gets the party off to an early start. Steer clear of these all-too-common errors, and you’ll serve an evening your company will cherish for years to come.